The weather is getting colder outside as winter approaches, but my heart feels warm and content. I can’t believe that yesterday marked the end of Term 1 teaching and learning at LSHTM (there are still three exams left, though). It feels as if it was just yesterday that I couldn’t sleep well, worrying about my first day of school, wondering if I would make friends in this faraway place, and questioning my own capacity to follow the lecture.

Yet, here I am now. 

Term 1 wasn't a walk in the park, yet I loved it so much. I enjoyed writing the Health Policy essay, whose language at the beginning sounds like it comes from another world. Epidemiology concepts and those statistical values really tested my patience and confidence, but oddly, it made me want to revise them over and over again. Health Economics left me feeling lost and helpless at times. However, I found myself spending my precious bedtime reading the textbook and watching YouTube videos explaining deadweight loss and monopoly markets. Only to find out those topics weren’t even asked in the exam!! But anyway, it was a rewarding academic journey indeed. 

Tomyum in the middle of grappling Health Economics concepts

Yet, here I am now.  

I visited the Covent Garden Christmas Market with those I can now call my people. I have the best tutor (Hi, Lauren!), in front of whom I could even cry without shame or feeling judged. On the last day of term, I spent hours talking and laughing and smiling with those who coloured my past three months. There were also long conversations at Yuhyeon’s dorm, where we talked about trivial and essential things. And then, there were random calls, texts and small moments that never ceased to make me smile during the tiring days. 

The Covent Garden Christmas Market

I am grateful that I can enjoy all of this despite the uneasy post-graduate journey. I can be too serious sometimes, like when I decided not to join the Christmas party and do my essay instead. I questioned my decision and felt FOMO after seeing the pictures in the Whatsapp group. But I think, even if I had the chance to turn back time, I would still choose to do my essay again and again. And I don’t want to regret this because I know what I am doing (and I still have another Christmas party at school!)

As this is the end of term 1, I want to write down some reflections, and here they are: 

1. Frustrations cannot be eliminated and are unavoidable. However, it can be managed. I can always take a break and prioritise. I may not be able to do everything at once, but I can do everything one step at a time. Some days were so heavy that I went sleep very early (6 pm, once). On other days, I stayed up until 2 am, excitedly studying. Neither is better than the other; it simply depends on what I need that day.
2. Learning can be both frustrating and rewarding. Grappling with new concepts, getting to know unfamiliar territories through reading, scribbling critical thoughts, and filling my thick A4 notebook with colourful Muji pens are experiences I know I will cherish for the rest of my life.  
   
3. Feelings are fleeting. Happiness, sadness, loneliness, frustration, excitement, attachment, anger, infatuation, etc: they don’t last forever. I hope I can never forget to embrace them when they arise. 
4. Journaling matters. Writing helps crystallise memories before they fade. Sometimes it’s scary to face my own thoughts and feelings, and I delay the writing because I’m afraid I won’t do the experience justice. But when I wait too long, the feelings change, become blur or disappear. Writing imperfectly on this blog is one way I can make the moment last for a long, long time. 

Term 1 is over. I know the upcoming terms are more challenging. The block system and starting to think about the summer project will occupy my time 24/7. But right now, I feel at peace, like, I'm doing my best. I think, I became less afraid of getting lost. I know eventually I'll find my path and everything will fall into place. 

Plaistow

13 December 2025

4:21pm

Survived the first week as an LSHTM postgrad student, yaay!

Hi. My head is filled with voices and chatter. When I was on the tube this evening, I wanted to be home soon to sit in front of my laptop and try to untangle them one by one by writing about it in this blog. 

However, right now, I don't know where to start; my brain starts overcomplicating everything, worrying that I wouldn't be able to make good paragraphs, and deliver my messy voice inside this head to a blog post. But I know I need to write this. 

So, here it goes. 

It's been 19 days since I arrived at 19 Glasgow Road, London. The first week was heaven: school hadn't started yet, plenty of time to spend with my own self, the sun was still out, so the temperature wasn't too chilly yet. I finally stepped out of this house on Day Two (still struggling with jet lag at this point) to do some grocery shopping. Third day, I tried my tube route to the campus, and fourth day (or was it fifth?) I went to Kak Citra's house to drop off the butternut (is kemiri a butternut in English? or is it candlenut?)

Week 2 was the welcoming week at the university. I was overwhelmed by all the new names and faces, the information overload (about school), and the sheer amount of socialising. However, this was a super fun week, my programme even had a field trip to Reading. We walked along the River Thames, played games, stayed there for a night, and had good meals and conversation. I instantly loved my programme directors (hi, Hannah, Simon, Daniel!). 

MSc Public Health for Global Practice, 2025-26 Cohort

Goring-on-Thames, Reading

Week 3 was when my class started. I learned that my classes always run from Monday morning (9.30 am) and right through the evening (5.30 pm). This is a bit different from the other MSc programmes. There are so many assignments and reading materials, and also group presentations. So far, I'm enjoying Extended Epidemiology and Health Policy: Process and Power (this class is a bit intimidating, though). Health Economics is also interesting. That leaves two other modules: Statistics and Principles for Social Research. I'm still figuring out how I feel about those two. Maybe by the end of the term, I'll write about the modules again. 

Other than five modules, there are 3 other sessions in a week for my cohort only, MSc Public Health for Global Practice. In these sessions, students do the seminar, and we discuss things about global health and global practice.

To cap off this first week of classes, Putri and I hit up Eat Tokyo in Soho (after we went to Primark and Uniqlo, haha). The sushi was so so tasty and the bento was perfect!

A corner in London, at night

As we walked toward Tottenham Court Road station, Putri said, "It still feels surreal that we're living in London, ya kak."

Indeed, Put. It really does. 

New student card!

Sometimes I still can't believe that I'm living my dream, going to the LSHTM and pursuing my postgraduate study. But the beauty of this surreal moment is that it's real, and it's just the beginning of everything. Week 3 was a reminder that this dream requires hard work - a lot of assignments, sleepless nights, and tons of presentations. I'm excited and a little bit terrified, to be honest. And it's still a little chaotic in here (my head), but I guess that's what happens when you step out of your comfort zone, when you trade your mundane and quiet life for a postgrad education, abroad. 

Sat, 4 October 2025

19 Glasgow Rd

 

Hi. 

Last Monday, 15 September 2025, I arrived in London after an almost 20-hour flight. Surprisingly, I felt at ease even though I'll be away from Arina for a year. She was being a big girl with a big heart on the day of my departure. She didn't cry or throw a scene at the airport (I've been worried for nothing!)

Yesterday was the welcoming day for the international students. It was a bit intimidating because I learnt that my class will be on Mon-Fri from 9-5. This programme is very intensive and I guess I don't have much time left for anything other than study. 

I can feel the trepidation and at the same time, I can also sense the excitement. Let's see how it goes. One thing that I can be sure of, when I was on the tube and looking at London city through the window, I could feel that I belonged here. 

19 Glasgow Rd,

11.23 pm

James Clear in his book Atomic Habits said that our actions reveal how bad we want something. I realised that my motivation to regularly write in this blog might not be strong enough since it has been almost 4 months since my last post. I have hundreds of brain dumps to write and countless inner chatter in my head; however, sometimes it feels very challenging to face my thoughts and feelings and it takes so much courage to write them down in this blog. I know avoiding them — instead of dissecting and solving them one by one (if needed) — will be detrimental to my mental health. So this is me, trying to do journaling again. Apart from cataloguing my life updates, I also want to get used to writing in English. 

There were not many updates from the last quarter of 2024. However, there were at least 2 highlights: I passed the LPDP scholarship on 7 November 2024 and went to Geneva for the second time on 18-24 November 2024. Getting the LPDP scholarship might sound like a big achievement, but honestly, the euphoria only felt for 2-3 days. After that I kept on questioning myself on my competencies, I was afraid getting the LPDP was merely a stroke of luck. This is the thing about being people with insecurities, no matter how many people validate my skills and competencies, I always feel that I'm not good enough. Then, my second highlight was going to Switzerland to attend the meeting of the WHO Member States Mechanism on Substandard and Falsified Medical Products. I was connected with many new people during the meeting, including Rutendo himself (ISF team lead). That business trip even validated my choice of taking a master's in public health. Lastly, I was connected to some people like Bu Lucky S Slamet, Pak Roy S. Sparringa, bu Togi, and Bu Ratna. They're people I've looked up to, all this time. 

Moving to January 2025, I had my worst birthday. I cried almost all day reflecting on all the things I've been through. Almost everyone forgot my birthday, even my mom and Gautam; making 7th January 2025 worse than ever. I don't think I'll like that date again in the future (or I'll be happy on that day). The following day, I had a psychologist appointment; so it meant another crying session! On the brighter side, I read more books in January, or actually since December 2024. I've started reading fiction again, which saved me from my reading slump. I met Sofia who introduced me to Colleen Hoover and other writers. So far I've read 5 books. I hope my reading habit keeps going strong this year. 

Today is 6 February 2025, and my latest update was I got a Letter of Acceptance from the University of Edinburgh. I'm still anxiously waiting for LSHTM's decision, though. I'm dying to get into LSHTM, so please God let me.

Hm. I think that's all. I'm not good at making closing statements. So, see you!

Cheers,
Neti

from Batik Building, 3rd floor